Church of Record:

National Office
The Christian and Missionary Alliance
8595 Explorer Drive
Colorado Springs, CO 80920

Mailing Address:
P.O. Box 35000
Colorado Springs, CO 80935-3500
Telephone: (719) 599-5999
 http://www.cmalliance.org/natoffice.htm
 

Rev. Andy Snodgrass,
Fox Island Alliance Church,
655 6th Avenue
Fox Island, WA 98333
V. (253) 549-2831
F. (253) 549-2747
http://www.foxisland.org

first email/communication recieved by the steward of PeaceMakers...

11/26/03
My wife has filed for a legal separation in the Superior Court in an attempt to get me to submit to her and the courts authority. Our church leadership is absent and is justifying sin. Can you help?

You all are in our prayers-this is such a terrible thing. As you have probably read some of the materials on PeaceMakers.net you can get a pretty good picture as to our beliefs and practices of God's marriage and home principals.  These days we've found them rarely taught and more rarely lived.  We can only help those who choose to live for Christ among the many who only pretend-2 Timothy 3.

We'd be glad to speak with those in stewardhip of Christ's authority in your Church to encourage their Biblical responsibility with our walk of faith and understanding of God's help-2 Corinthians 1.

You can give them a copy of this email and you can send us their names, phone numbers, and email addresses.

In our home fellowship we have two women that continue to practice Biblical values as wives and mothers who are available to help as needed.  It would be our prayer your wife would turn to God's Biblical process of resolving your issues within Christ's body-to which we offer our services as Biblical counselors and Biblical PeaceMakers-Matthew 18, Ephesians 4-6, 1 Peter 3, et.al.

For you X, we begin in Matthew 5-7, Christ's identification of HIS will and the purification of your eyes First, before we attempt to love and care for your wife.

So Yes we can help by sharing our faith with those who truly desire Christ-all others will see our efforts and faith through their delusions. 2 Thessalonians 2

God's blessings,
The steward@peacemakers.net

I will forward their information in a separate email.

A little background on the support I am not getting from the church. Andy told me the following regarding our discussion on biblical submission in a marriage; " X, if God is calling me into the ministry, and my wife can not be happy in this, then I can not go into the ministry. I have an obligation to my wife". I couldn't believe that he said this,so I questioned him to be sure he meant what he said. He meant it.  To which I replied, "That is very unfortunate because your wife's unhappiness has very little to do with what you are doing, but more with the choices SHE is making."

When I received the papers from my wife, I called Andy to inform him with the hope that he would confront my wife about this being against the Word of God.  His reply was shameful. " Yes X, she informed me that she was going to be hiring an attorney and getting a court order for legal seperation."

I am certainly not perfect, but my desire is to obey God's word regardless of ANY earthly consequences or costs.

Thank you again for your ministry and prayers.  X

In Christ,

Bill Fields-a steward of Christ's authority at:
PeaceMakers.net, Inc.
http://www.peacemakers.net
[phone omitted]

You do have my correct email address.  Just be advised that there is more to the story than you have heard from X.  I am sure you have been at this ministry long enough to understand that. We are acquainted with Peace Makers through a pastor and wife, [omitted].  As long as X tries to use Scripture and believers to attack his wife's "lack of submission" I don't think there will be any gain.  There are many that, having observed X, have real concerns about his psychological health.  Some are attempting to help him on this but he is not very receptive.
Just be wise in your interaction.

Thanks, Andy Snodgrass
Senior Pastor Fox Island Alliance Church

I am pasting a correction to X that is representative of what the Christian community and I have been saying to him.  I think you should read it so that you can get a feel for what X is doing.   It follows:

Thanks, Andy Snodgrass

If you are receiving this email, its because you have been copied by X in emails recently dealing with his family's situation. Someone needed to stand up for Y, what X has said in words and email need to be addressed. I encourage you to read to the end!
-----------------------------------
I can no longer sit idle in the midst of your constant attacks on Y and her supporters. Because these people have taken a stand that neither agree with your views nor compromises their own you feel it necessary to call them “cowards!” Your choice of words does not fit with what your trying to convey whereas a coward is defined as “one who shows disgraceful fear or timidity,” in fact the opposite must apply considering all you have mentioned - have stood in defiance of your twisted half truths when it comes to biblical scripture. I’d prefer if you would from now on refer to these people as stalwart’s, as they stand in the face of your constant attacks on their character and motives as they express to you their stance on the issue of submission as described in the bible.

How can you sit there and say that your “prayers continue to be answered?” How does this make your wife feel? Your children? Your friends? I want to make it perfectly clear your wife has not been deceived by the devil; in fact, I would submit your suffering from an acute form of stubbornness that has fueled your pride to the point where you would have to admit the wrong doings of your past to repair any hope for the future. Unfortunately your pride has taken over, to the extreme point where you have declared war on your family. The truth be known, YOU have allowed Satan to deceive you!

I won’t spend too much time on the submission issue because you and I have been butting heads for over 6 years on this issue. You have twisted scripture, its meaning and its intention to fit your pattern of abuse that has resided in your marriage.

What is the definition of submission? It is yielding to another's desires without resistance. Submission to another's wishes is an attitude of the heart done willingly, while surrender is yielding by being forced to do so. Our first submission should be unto the Lord. "Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind'' (Matthew 22:37). God never forces someone to follow Him nor does He want us to be forced to follow or yield to another human being. He wants us to lovingly submit to Him and to each other. However, because of the evil in some men's hearts a person under their authority can be abusive and a submissive person can be asked to do things that they do not believe is right. That is why the Bible also gives perimeters to submission. There are Scriptures that give us a guideline as to how far any human being is to submit to another. We need to understand the proper role of submission in marriage so that our homes will be harmonious and free of contention.

The Bible teaches that, in the Spirit, women are equal with men, and each must submit unto Jesus as their spiritual head. In the flesh, in the marriage relationship, women are to be subject to their husband's headship. The Lord ordained that the man be the one that would make final decisions in the home because in any relationship involving two people one must be the final authority. In the marriage, or fleshly relationship, the man is the head and should guide his home and family. In the spirit, Jesus Christ is the head of His family and He guides each member according to His headship. Men are to love their wives like Jesus loves the church. He laid His life down for her. Men that are demanding that their wives submit to them have not learned the right way to win them and that is to love them with the love of the Lord.

"Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and He is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband" (Ephesians 5:21-33).

Submission to a husband does not mean a woman is to be a slave in bondage to that man, but rather it is to be a mutual submission in love. The above scripture says we are to submit unto each other. Submission means to yield or "to set yourself under." From this definition we see we are to yield to one another instead of demanding our own way. Love should be the rule in our homes, and we should "prefer one another." Not only should this be especially true in our homes, but in our church family as well.

Your so caught up in “fear” and “obedience” when it comes to your personal relationship with GOD you have forgotten what the relationship is really all about, LOVE! LOVE, as in unconditional, faithful and true. GOD wants us to freely follow him, love him and share his love with others so they may get to know him as we do. GOD has not commanded you to discipline Y but rather love her unconditionally, support her, and build her up in Christ.

You have unfairly and publicly degraded a beautiful women that GOD loves very much. You have lied and sinned against your wife and continue to attack her unfairly. You have brought to the light everything you possibly could in order to try and tear Y down. You have stopped at nothing and you should repent and get on your knees and pray that not only GOD forgive you for your sinful ways but your wife and children as well. Your actions are un-defendable, your words disgraceful. You raise your trumpet like a sword covered in half truths and lies, and use it to try and destroy one of GODs children publicly. Many who have first hand knowledge of this situation are so appalled and shocked they can only offer up mental illness as an excuse for your behavior but I am not buying it. Yes I acknowledge there is history of mental illness and I agree some of this is a result of you ignoring it for so long, but at the same time I KNOW you fully understand what your doing and saying. Your calculating in your actions and I see right through your motives. You have declared war on your own family and your stubborn pride has taken hold of you!

You were SHOCKED when Y told you she had seen a lawyer. You never thought she would go thru with it, you were convinced you had control over her, your were certain your years of abuse provided the noose that would make it possible for you to once again force her into submission in another area. GOD has lifted Y up, supported her in her decisions and now X you must deal with that!

Your most recent actions are disheartening and very concerning. Attacking Y hasn’t yielded the kind of results you were hoping for so your next course of action is to drag the children into the middle. In just about every possible situation, you have placed your kids in the middle of your personal battles. Your disregard for their feelings is sickening, you should feel ashamed. Your witness to the world is playing out daily in this situation, GOD is there and he is taking note, your actions, and words are your true witness as his follower. I hope your listening to what I am saying.

X, I have never known a more gracious, grateful, loving person than your wife. She has put up with years of disruptive and abusive behavior and habits exhibited by you and Y has always tried to make the best of it. But for some reason you have found displeasure in her and have acted out in this dishonorable fashion.

I want all who read this to know that Y is NOT as X describes in his emails. If you know her, you know what I am writing is true, if you don’t know her, you need to question X and what he is saying, then try to judge for yourself. If any of you care about this situation and the people involved, and your direct council to X, you are best advised to direct him to start acting as GOD would want him to, he is to act honorably in every situation, put others before himself, especially his wife and children. I also encourage any of you who are beholding to X in any way put it aside and stand up for what is right and just, do not turn your back on this situation.

X you need to realize that this situation is real and that you cannot manipulate Y any longer into what you thinks is right. Its time you start to realize that you are no longer in control of this situation, you need to understand that you have responsibilities to fulfill and now is the time you start to meet those responsibilities head on. Put your pride aside, get on your knees and pray that GOD may heal your situation that he may give you the strength and courage to do the right things, that he may give you the self control needed for you to act honorably while you face the consequences of your recent actions.

“Judge not, and you shall not be judged. Condemn not, and you shall not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven.” LUKE 6:37

The decision to turn this bad situation into a positive one starts with you. I am challenging you to start acting in a manner that is pleasing to GOD. Uphold the INTEGRITY you have claimed for so many years to have; practice what you preach! This starts with keeping your children as far away from this situation as possible, don't preach to them on your personal feelings with regard to this situation- I challenge you to talk to them at their level and express your love for them and your concern, comfort them with your words and actions, and stop tearing down their mother for this only causes more confusion and insecurities. Next, watch how you treat Y, stop berating her, demeaning her, cursing her and demoralizing her. The damage you have inflicted CAN get worse so start building her up and repairing the relationship for the future. The way you talk to her and treat her is appalling, I have heard first hand your rants and raves, your disrespect and mental abuse and to be honest I am tired of it. It needs to STOP!

X, HUMBLE YOURSELF!

“For whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and he who knows himself will be exalted.” LUKE 14:11

Proverbs 16:18 warns that if we put our efforts in PROMOTING ourselves, we will be brought down. Much like what you have tried to do in this situation by involving others, tearing down Y in their eyes while “promoting” your own interests, will only bring to you a consequence of your own personal destruction, you will bear the brunt of your actions and will be brought down!

Dear Pastor Snodgrass, X and Y, and other steward of Christ's
authority,

There is a lot to consider in this email...

We have briefly (to avoid slander, backbitting, etc.) overviewed the materials sent us to establish:
1. There is a dispute between a husband and wife who both profess Christ.
2. There is at least one professing Church in stewardhip of Christ's authority (Y's)
3. There is an issue of theology concerning the duties of husbands & wives.

First, has there been a Biblical Matthew 18 process with binding & loosing by those in stewardhip of Christ's authority?
A recommened Church Discipline Process as a Biblical guide
http://www.peacemakers.net/peace/apra.htm

Often there is a lot of evil speaking, gossip, etc. in disputes
http://www.peacemakers.net/peace/jwcureofevil.htm
http://www.peacemakers.net/unity/detract.htm

Biblical Husbands & Wives:
http://www.peacemakers.net/unity/srthechristianhome.htm
http://www.peacemakers.net/unity/christbehav-bun.html
http://www.peacemakers.net/unity/rsdutiesofhusbandsandwives.htm

If one spouse is treated as an unbeliever
http://www.peacemakers.net/unity/pcunequallyyoked.htm
http://www.peacemakers.net/unity/1corinthians7-12-13.htm

If you each agree for the steward of PeaceMakers to assist further in establishing a Biblical forum acting as witnesses in the hearing, establishing and binding and loosing of this dispute, we'd be glad to further identify the necessary steps and scripture to proceed.

You all continue in our prayers,

Bill Fields
steward@peacemakers.net

Thanks for your response. I am currently attending Believers Fellowship in [omitted], WA. I have spoken to an elder and we are to schedule a meeting
as I need to be under the authority of a believing church.

I met with my attorney today and we are going to ask that the hearing date be postponed until after the new year. My hope is to buy some time so that
we can keep the ungodly judges out of this. My friend who recommended your ministry (omitted) was in town last night and he and I had dinner together. He suggested that he meet with Y and I as a neutral party in an effort to avoid a hearing and seek biblical reconciliation, unfortunately she was unwilling (at this time) according to [omitted].

I will notify you of a contact at [omitted]. I am very hopeful and very willing to extend much Grace in this difficult issue as long as it honors my need to obey God in the area of serving the needs of others as He directs.

Thank you for your efforts and prayers. X

There are many organizations who call themself Peacemakers. Read our pages and our materials to be sure if it's our help you want.

X wrote: "
Thanks for your response. I am currently attending [omitted], WA. I have spoken to an elder and we are to schedule a meeting
as I need to be under the authority of a believing church."

At this stage of our participation we CAN NOT say that X should be looking for another church-it has yet been determined if a Biblical
discipline process has been followed.  Should X go to another church-that church would NOW be a part of the process and in Christian
Fellowship with Fox Island Alliance Church toward bringing God's peace to this conflict.

Church Discipline Between Churches Chapter 10. by Dr. Jay E. Adams "HANDBOOK
OF CHURCH DISCIPLINE"  http://www.timelesstexts.com

So far I have been considering discipline within the local church that
involves members of the same congregation. Now it is important to tackle the
somewhat more complex questions of how to handle the problem of cross-congregational
discipline.

Within the same denomination the ways and means for pursuing
cross-congregational discipline are usually formalized in a denominational
book of government and discipline. If they are not, you should work for a common Book of Discipline
that provides for such measures.

What I wish to address in this chapter is the more difficult problem of how
to carry on discipline among churches that are not related denominationally.

Bob and Phil, members of two Bible-believing congregations of different
persuasions, have broken fellowship over a business deal. Phil. an
automobile mechanic, maintains that all the work he did on Bob's car was necessary and, though he
charged Bob five hundred dollars, that was a good price for the labor and
parts provided; indeed, below the going rate. Bob disagrees. He thinks that Phil
did unnecessary work on the car and has stuck him with a huge bill, which he
refuses to pay. Bob claims that he told Phil to let him know if the cost would exceed
two hundred dollars; Phil says Bob gave no such instructions. Rather, Phil
maintains that Bob said, "Go ahead and do whatever has to be done," and indicated no
reservations about the cost.

The matter cannot be resolved by going to court (1 Corinthians 6 forbids
that-God forbids believers to take other believers to court.), But since
they cannot work it out between them, the matter must be settled by the church. Bob has told a
number of people at his church what a rotten deal he got and how Phil
cheated him. As a result, there is evidence that Phil's business is suffering. Phil has not
yet been paid.

Phil goes to his pastor for advice. The pastor says, "It seems to me that
since Bob has made the matter public, it can be dealt with on that level.
But why don't you take a couple of mutual friends and try once more to work out matters? If
you do not succeed, go to his pastor and seek help."

One more a visit is made. Phil and those with him get nowhere. Bob says he
will not pay a cent more than two hundred dollars, and he refuses to discuss
the issue further. Phil makes an appointment with Bob's pastor, asking him to bring
the matter officially before the church. The pastor in turn suggests that
all four talk about it; he sets a date for the conference. But nothing comes of their meeting. Both
men state and steadfastly maintain their positions. Bob tries to hand Phil a
check for two hundred dollars and declares that the matter is over. He wants to hear no
more about it. Phil shows the pastor receipts for parts that, apart from
extensive labor costs, amount to nearly two hundred dollars in themselves. He refuses to
take the check, declaring that to do so is to forfeit his right to a larger sum.

Where does the matter go from here? Regardless of how the issue turns
out-which is not our concern at the moment-what steps should Phil take from
here on?

Phil has two options. First, in accordance with 1 Corinthians 6:7 he can
determine to accept the loss and drop the whole matter. If he does so, he
must be sure he bears no resentment against Bob. In particular he must not speak
disparagingly about Bob to others. If Phil drops it, it must be dropped
entirely (Incidentally, Phil had this option at earlier stages as well.)

But it would seem from his refusal to accept the check that Phil will want
to pursue the matter further. Given his rejection of the first option, what
is Phil's second? He may pursue the matter officially before Bob's church. He should inform the
pastor that he is not satisfied to let the matter drop and settle for two
hundred dollars, especially since he has lost five customers from Bob's church because of
what he can only call slanderous gossip on Bob's part. His concern is that
the church deal with his charges of theft and slander against Bob.

Before making charges of slander or gossiping, Phil must have evidence to
substantiate them. This will consist not only of presenting the bills and
receipts that he brought to the first conference, but also being able to call on witnesses to
the slanderous statements made to others. If he can produce such evidence,
he will be in a position to establish his case. Apart from evidence and witnesses, he should
not proceed further (cf. 2 Corinthians 13:1).

WHAT IF THE CHURCH DEFAULTS?

All of the foregoing is rather simple and straightforward. But what if Bob's
church refuses to hear Phil? What if the pastor says, "Well, Phil, I've done
all I can to reconcile the two of you. In our church we don't do anything more; no, we
will not discipline Bob." This possibility is not at all unlikely today.

There is no direct biblical instruction about this matter because there was
no denominational problem in the first century (although there were
interchurch dealings such as the council described in Acts 15). But using the approach stipulated
by the words of Christ in Matthew 18, it would seem that the following procedure
should be followed:

1. Phil (perhaps with the guidance of his own pastor) should gently read
Matthew 18:15ff. to Bob's pastor and urge him and his church to follow the
Scriptures in this matter. He should not simply go along with weakness on the part of Bob's
church. Rather, in a kind but firm manner, he should insist that, since they
call themselves a Bible?believing church, they are bound to do what the Bible requires. Often
this sort of kind but strong pressure will prevail.

2. If that action proves to be fruitless, then (on the basis of Matthew 18)
he should take someone with him (preferably his own pastor) to confront
Bob's pastor. Frequently the matter will be settled at this level.

3. But suppose Bob's pastor refuses to hear them. Then, on the analogy of
Matthew 18, he should "tell it to the church." That would probably mean
having Phil's elders request a meeting with the elders of Bob's church. If this meeting
occurs, Phil's elders may be able to persuade Bob's that this is the
biblical thing to do and may be able to help them in conducting a fair trial. The issue in points 2
and 3, please note, is not Phil's losses, but the question of whether Bob's
church will follow Matthew 18. The two issues should not be confused.

4. Let us suppose, as too often is true, that Bob's elders refuse to meet
or, after meeting, refuse to carry the case further. Then, short of Phil's
willingness at this point to drop the whole matter, his church would seem to have but one recourse:
again, on the analogy of Matthew 18, Phil's church should declare Bob's
church to be "as heathen and publicans." That is to say, they should declare them to be "no
church" since they will not draw a line between the world and the church by
exercising discipline. (Even if Phil should wish to drop his matter against Bob. the
other issue-the dealings between the two churches-should be pursued to its
end. A church. declared to be no church. may be restored upon repentance.)

This decision should never be taken unless the most careful and kind
attempts have been made to try to effect proper discipline in the other
church. But there must come q point at which the matter is set to rest. God will have no loose ends
dangling in His church.

5. If Bob's church is declared to be no church by Phil's church, then and
only then may Phil treat Bob "as a heathen and a tax collector." If he
wishes to do so, Phil may now take Bob to civil court. At times this may be an unwise move, a poor
testimony in a community that doesn't understand, and in some cases, even an
unloving act if done in bitterness. But the practical possibility now
exists. Sometimes it is wiser to drop the matter here (or earlier), and Phil
always has that option.

6. If the act of declaring another church to be no church (because it will
not define itself by church discipline) is to be carried out, it is
important to keep accurate records, testimony, etc., of all that transpired. Moreover, before doing so,
the other church should be warned of the possibility of this action.

Let me suggest two variations on this theme. Where a congregation is part of
a denomination, the matter should be taken through the procedures prescribed
by the denominational standards before taking the step of declaring it no church.
In the case of a nondenominational congregation or one in which the
denomination does not function in cases of church discipline, it might be advisable to call in
one or two other congregations in the community to intercede; if nothing
results from this, have those congregations agree also to declare the contumacious congregation
to be no church.

RESPECTING DISCIPLINE

There is another matter. Consider this scenario: Frank leaves his wife,
Alice, for another woman. All efforts to bring about reconciliation fail.
Frank is removed from the midst of his church. Sometime later he divorces Alice and marries the
other woman. Several months after the remarriage, Frank decides to unite
with another church down the street.

Frank's former pastor calls up the pastor of the second congregation and
tells him that Frank was removed from the church of Jesus Christ on proper
grounds by church discipline. He says, "We would rejoice if Frank is repentant and if
he wants to become a part of your church. We certainly won't stand in his
way. But first he has business over here. He must seek Alice's forgiveness and the forgiveness
of the congregation. Until then, he isn't eligible for membership in Christ's church
anywhere."

If the second pastor responds biblically, Frank will be refused membership
unless he repents and does works appropriate to repentance (at a bare minimum, that
means settling matters with Alice and the former congregation). But, as in
many situations, let us suppose that the second church receives him anyway.
Then it would seem that on the analogy of Matthew 18, the two churches must become
involved to the point of satisfaction or the unchurching of Frank's new
congregation by his former one.

Now, if proper procedures were in effect in the first place, such things
would not happen. Whenever a stray sheep wanders into another fold, or
whenever a person removed from the midst of one congregation seeks membership in another, he
should be dealt with in a way that shows proper respect for the care and the
discipline of the congregation to which he belongs. After all, it is difficult enough
to get churches to exercise biblical discipline in the first place. How
discouraging it is to find that it has been undercut by some other church down the block!

HANDLING CHURCH HOPPERS

What am I talking about? Well, first let's take up the question of the
church hopper. There are times when a person should change churches, but he
ought to do so for only the gravest reasons: a major change of doctrinal beliefs, apostasy
on the part of the former church, or its failure to exercise discipline. Too
many persons wander from church to church for superficial reasons. If the churches in a
community were to draw up a procedure to deal with wandering Christians, far
more wanderers would be reclaimed. It would resemble something like this
interchange:

"Well, it was nice to see you in church Sunday."

"Thank you, pastor, I appreciate your visit."

"Are you new in town?"

"O no! We've lived here for about ten years."

"Then perhaps you have just become Christians or are seeking to find out how
to become Christians?"

"No, we've been members of the Hilltop Church since we moved here."

"I see. Well, then you've recently had a change of belief, so you are
looking for a church that is more compatible with your new beliefs?"

"No. We just got tired of going there. The people aren't so nice, and I can
just tell that we're going to like it much better in your church. Why, your
people were so friendly, and here you are already paying us a visit!"  How many pastors and
elders are taken in by such flattery!

"Well, I'm certainly happy to hear of the friendly greeting you received,
but there seems to be a problem. You know, Joe, your pastor is a Bible
believing man. He may not see everything exactly as we do here, but he is a true shepherd and
you are one of his flock. If you don't have a better reason for leaving that
fold, you really belong there at Hilltop and not somewhere else. If you've had difficulty
with some of the people there or with the pastor, I'd be happy to set up an
appointment to meet together with them and see what we can do to bring about restoration."

"Oh, I see! Well, thanks, but no thanks.

"At any rate, I'll let your pastor know we've had this talk."

This wandering sheep will try another congregation. He should be met with a
similar response at each place. If this were to become the practice, there
would be far less wandering; church hoppers would be required to stay and face the
problems they are trying to avoid.

In some places where I have spoken about this matter, pastors have drawn up
a set of guidelines to follow. Why not talk to your local ministerium about it? Even if
only two or three congregations go along with the procedure, it would be a
marked improvement. Indeed, even if you can get no other church to go along
but you make it a practice of returning straying sheep to other shepherds, you could
do much by your example to gain respect for discipline among the
congregations of your community.

Obviously, if the person has wandered from a liberal church, where the
pastor is a wolf in shepherd's clothing, you will do all you can to snatch
him away from the clutches of that wolf. But you should always attempt to restore a sheep to a
true shepherd. Besides, you get no bargain when a person leaves a church for
the wrong reasons.

Consider this. I had just arrived as the new pastor of a congregation when I
received a phone call from the pastor of a neighboring church. He asked,

"What can you tell me about Mr. and Mrs. So and So? I understand that they
used to be members of your congregation. They've been attending here lately
and want to join, but there seems to be something problematic about their past."

I responded,

"I can tell you absolutely nothing. I just arrived; I hardly know my elders'
names. But I'll try to find out."

I called him back:

"I asked my elders, and they tell me that the So and Sos were disciplined by
our church and removed from the midst. (Actually. at that point I was still
using the word "excommunicated ") You'd better talk to them about it. If they are
truly repentant we wouldn't mind them uniting with your church, but they
have unfinished business here first. We would be glad to restore them upon repentance and
then, if they wish us to do so, send them by letter to your church."

"Oh!" he said. "Thanks."

I didn't hear from the pastor again, but some months later I saw him at a
pastors' gathering. I asked about the So and Sos.

"Oh," he said. "We took them in anyway, and they have just split our
congregation. They took half a dozen families and went to start another
church."

Don't expect anything but storms when you take a Jonah into your boat!

DIVISIVE PERSONS

Let me say a word about schism. In Titus 3:10 Paul writes, "After counseling
him once or twice, give up on a divisive person, and have nothing more to do
with him."

This is a vital direction. There should be provision to speed up the
disciplinary process in cases of divisive persons. If you linger too long
over the process, you may find your church divided. Paul is clear: if the divisive person does not
cease his divisive ways after one or two confrontations, remove him.

In cross?congregational discipline, therefore, it is not enough to do what
you can at your own church. It is essential, also, to hold other churches
responsible to follow Christ's directives. When another congregation refuses to follow the
discipline that Christ provided for your member and you do nothing about it,
it is not only that other congregation that is lax. If you fail to make every effort to get that
congregation to satisfy Christ's demands, you too are guilty, and the care
of your own member is seriously lacking. If the other congregation refuses to listen to
your biblical directives, then that congregation, no less than an individual
believer, should be "removed from the midst."

It is imperative that all these disciplinary steps be taken-and taken with
the right attitude.

LIBERAL CHURCHES?

Where you have certain knowledge that a congregation denies the essentials
of Christianity, you should not send persons back. Indeed, you should do all
you can to get people out of such "churches." Admittedly, many cases are borderline and
not quite so clear. But in the case of a liberal church, it would seem, you
have a clear obligation to pursue discipline.

In those instances in which the other congregation rightly responds by
exercising discipline, you may be pleasantly surprised to discover brothers
where you once wondered about them. In cases where a congregation refuses to pursue
discipline on behalf of a member of your congregation and you must declare
them to be "no church," the discipline issue itself is what allows you to make that
statement. Either way, discipline helps sharpen the focus of an otherwise
fuzzy situation.

All inter-congregational discipline must be carried on with the utmost care.
Special care must be taken so as not to "take sides" with members of your
own congregation but, instead, to make impartial judgments based on the facts.

In cases where you disagree with the judgment of another congregation, you
may have to act according to your conscience in ways that differ from that
judgment-but only after it has been made perfectly clear that you appreciate
that they have rendered judgment. Your reasons for departing from their
judgment should be given: and just as when brothers are separated by other
differences which grow out of divergent interpretations and applications of
the Scriptures, you must continue to recognize the other congregation as a true church of
Christ.

This is very different from declaring a church to be no church. In almost
every instance, the judgment of the disciplining church should be accepted.
Only in cases where the judgment involved matters of conscience should it be disregarded.

steward@peacemakers.net

Is there anybody in the Pacific Northwest area that can get more involved in a way besides just email? I will gladly pay all costs to have someone fly in and facilitate the ground rules and a foundation for this process.

Please let me know ASAP.
 X

Bill Fields is willing to fly as one who, Matthew 18:18-20 18 Verily I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. 19 Again I say unto you, That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven. 20 For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them.

We continue in prayer for you all...steward@peacemakers.net

Thank you,
X

I thank you for your concern and the prayers are especially important at this time. X and I have sought Biblical counseling from many in our community and he has at this time, refused to come under any authority from the church and others in the extended body. There are issues created from influences in his life that cause me to believe that he is only interested in using your ministry to discipline myself and others who don't agree with him. He has refused to have reasonable guidelines during this time of seperation and it is for the protection of our marriage and family that I have had to turn to the protective laws of our state. That is my choice at this time. I am declining your help at this time.

Thank you again for your time, Y

Also, I have spoken with an elder at [omitted] and we agreed that I should pursue reconciliation first with Fox Island Alliance and avoid the added complication of bringing another church into the process at this time. That is my desire.

Blessings, X

Can I schedule a phone conference with you. My wife has informed me that she will  not be pursuing  reconciliation with Peacemakers. I doesn't appear the
church (Fox Island) is willing to address the discipline issue either. What a mess.

In Christ, X

We are not surprised that we've come to this place...On the question of whether there was a Biblical discipline process your answer is silence-if
no, then all those refusing, have violated a basic teaching of Christ Jesus, Matthew 18, and those in failed stewardhip of Christ's authority at Fox
Island Alliance Church are to be publically rebuked...

Matthew 18:10 - 19:1 0 Take heed that ye despise not one of these little
ones; for I say unto you, That in heaven their angels do always behold the
face of my Father which is in heaven. 11 For the Son of man is come to save
that which was lost. 12 How think ye? if a man have an hundred sheep, and
one of them be gone astray, doth he not leave the ninety and nine, and goeth
into the mountains, and seeketh that which is gone astray? 13 And if so be
that he find it, verily I say unto you, he rejoiceth more of that sheep,
than of the ninety and nine which went not astray. 14 Even so it is not the
will of your Father which is in heaven, that one of these little ones should
perish. 15 Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell
him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast
gained thy brother. 16 But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one
or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be
established. 17 And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the
church: but if he neglect to hear the church, let him be unto thee as an
heathen man and a publican. 18 Verily I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall
bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever ye shall loose on
earth shall be loosed in heaven. 19 Again I say unto you, That if two of you
shall agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be
done for them of my Father which is in heaven. 20 For where two or three are
gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them. 21 Then came
Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I
forgive him? till seven times? 22 Jesus saith unto him, I say not unto thee,
Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven. 23 Therefore is the
kingdom of heaven likened unto a certain king, which would take account of
his servants. 24 And when he had begun to reckon, one was brought unto him,
which owed him ten thousand talents. 25 But forasmuch as he had not to pay,
his lord commanded him to be sold, and his wife, and children, and all that
he had, and payment to be made. 26 The servant therefore fell down, and
worshipped him, saying, Lord, have patience with me, and I will pay thee
all. 27 Then the lord of that servant was moved with compassion, and loosed
him, and forgave him the debt. 28 But the same servant went out, and found
one of his fellowservants, which owed him an hundred pence: and he laid
hands on him, and took him by the throat, saying, Pay me that thou owest. 29
And his fellowservant fell down at his feet, and besought him, saying, Have
patience with me, and I will pay thee all. 30 And he would not: but went and
cast him into prison, till he should pay the debt. 31 So when his
fellowservants saw what was done, they were very sorry, and came and told
unto their lord all that was done. 32 Then his lord, after that he had
called him, said unto him, O thou wicked servant, I forgave thee all that
debt, because thou desiredst me: 33 Shouldest not thou also have had
compassion on thy fellowservant, even as I had pity on thee? 34 And his lord
was wroth, and delivered him to the tormentors, till he should pay all that
was due unto him. 35 So likewise shall my heavenly Father do also unto you,
if ye from your hearts forgive not every one his brother their trespasses.
1 Timothy 5:19-21 19 Do not entertain an accusation against an elder unless
it is brought by two or three witnesses. 20 Those who sin are to be rebuked
publicly, so that the others may take warning. 21 I charge you, in the sight
of God and Christ Jesus and the elect angels, to keep these instructions
without partiality, and to do nothing out of favoritism.

and need of Godly sorrow and repentance...

2 Corinthians 7:6-11 But God, who comforts the downcast, comforted us by the
coming of Titus, 7 and not only by his coming but also by the comfort you
had given him. He told us about your longing for me, your deep sorrow, your
ardent concern for me, so that my joy was greater than ever. 8 Even if I
caused you sorrow by my letter, I do not regret it. Though I did regret it--
I see that my letter hurt you, but only for a little while-- 9 yet now I am
happy, not because you were made sorry, but because your sorrow led you to
repentance. For you became sorrowful as God intended and so were not harmed
in any way by us. 10 Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation
and leaves no regret, but worldly sorrow brings death. 11 See what this
godly sorrow has produced in you: what earnestness, what eagerness to clear
yourselves, what indignation, what alarm, what longing, what concern, what
readiness to see justice done. At every point you have proved yourselves to
be innocent in this matter.

If no, then all the talking and participation by everyone has been surrounded by gossip, slandering, backbiting, etc.-and in need of Godly
sorrow and repentance...

2 Corinthians 12:20-21 20 For I am afraid that when I come I may not find
you as I want you to be, and you may not find me as you want me to be. I
fear that there may be quarreling, jealousy, outbursts of anger, factions,
slander, gossip, arrogance and disorder. 21 I am afraid that when I come
again my God will humble me before you, and I will be grieved over many who
have sinned earlier and have not repented of the impurity, sexual sin and
debauchery in which they have indulged.

 If no, then all the conclusions reached by each person has been based upon your flesh and not God's love and Biblical judgment-regardless of if
accurate or not-it's all been corrupted.

Deuteronomy 1:17 17 Do not show partiality in judging; hear both small and
great alike. Do not be afraid of any man, for judgment belongs to God. Bring
me any case too hard for you, and I will hear it. John 7:24 Stop judging by
mere appearances, and make a right judgment."

1 Corinthians 6:1-20 NIV 1 Corinthians 6:1 If any of you has a dispute with
another, dare he take it before the ungodly for judgment instead of before
the saints? 2 Do you not know that the saints will judge the world? And if
you are to judge the world, are you not competent to judge trivial cases? 3
Do you not know that we will judge angels? How much more the things of this
life! 4 Therefore, if you have disputes about such matters, appoint as
judges even men of little account in the church! 5 I say this to shame you.
Is it possible that there is nobody among you wise enough to judge a dispute
between believers? 6 But instead, one brother goes to law against another--
and this in front of unbelievers! 7 The very fact that you have lawsuits
among you means you have been completely defeated already. Why not rather be
wronged? Why not rather be cheated? 8 Instead, you yourselves cheat and do
wrong, and you do this to your brothers. 9 Do you not know that the wicked
will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the
sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor
homosexual offenders 10 nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor
slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. 11 And that is
what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were
justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.
12 "Everything is permissible for me"-- but not everything is beneficial.
"Everything is permissible for me"-- but I will not be mastered by anything.
13 "Food for the stomach and the stomach for food"-- but God will destroy
them both. The body is not meant for sexual immorality, but for the Lord,
and the Lord for the body. 14 By his power God raised the Lord from the
dead, and he will raise us also. 15 Do you not know that your bodies are
members of Christ himself? Shall I then take the members of Christ and unite
them with a prostitute? Never! 16 Do you not know that he who unites himself
with a prostitute is one with her in body? For it is said, "The two will
become one flesh." 17 But he who unites himself with the Lord is one with
him in spirit. 18 Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits
are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. 19
Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in
you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were
bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.

To date each communication we have recieved has failed to address their own sin and contribution to this dispute...

Matthew 7:1-5 NIV Matthew 7:1 "Do not judge, or you too will be judged. 2
For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the
measure you use, it will be measured to you. 3 "Why do you look at the speck
of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your
own eye? 4 How can you say to your brother, 'Let me take the speck out of
your eye,' when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? 5 You
hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see
clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.

Galatians 5:13 - 6:5 13 For, brethren, ye have been called unto liberty;
only use not liberty for an occasion to the flesh, but by love serve one
another. 14 For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this; Thou
shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. 15 But if ye bite and devour one
another, take heed that ye be not consumed one of another. 16 This I say
then, Walk in the Spirit, and ye shall not fulfil the lust of the flesh. 17
For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh:
and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things
that ye would. 18 But if ye be led of the Spirit, ye are not under the law.
19 Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery,
fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, 20 Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred,
variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies, 21 Envyings,
murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you
before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things
shall not inherit the kingdom of God. 22 But the fruit of the Spirit is
love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, 23 Meekness,
temperance: against such there is no law. 24 And they that are Christ's have
crucified the flesh with the affections and lusts. 25 If we live in the
Spirit, let us also walk in the Spirit. 26 Let us not be desirous of vain
glory, provoking one another, envying one another. KJV Galatians 6:1
Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore
such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also
be tempted. 2 Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of
Christ. 3 For if a man think himself to be something, when he is nothing, he
deceiveth himself. 4 But let every man prove his own work, and then shall he
have rejoicing in himself alone, and not in another.

We pray this is not true of you and reaffirm if it is true, God waits for your repentance...until then, those for whom this is true are acting as
non-believers shaming our Lord and Savior-before the lost in secular court,

Matthew 5:21-26 21 Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou
shalt not kill; and whosoever shall kill shall be in danger of the judgment:
22 But I say unto you, That whosoever is angry with his brother without a
cause shall be in danger of the judgment: and whosoever shall say to his
brother, Raca, shall be in danger of the council: but whosoever shall say,
Thou fool, shall be in danger of hell fire. 23 Therefore if thou bring thy
gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against
thee; 24 Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be
reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift. 25 Agree with
thine adversary quickly, whiles thou art in the way with him; lest at any
time the adversary deliver thee to the judge, and the judge deliver thee to
the officer, and thou be cast into prison. 26 Verily I say unto thee, Thou
shalt by no means come out thence, till thou hast paid the uttermost
farthing.

steward@peacemakers.net

Hebrews 12:5-29 5 And you have forgotten that word of encouragement that
addresses you as sons: "My son, do not make light of the Lord's discipline,
and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, 6 because the Lord disciplines
those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son." 7 Endure
hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not
disciplined by his father? 8 If you are not disciplined (and everyone
undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons.
9 Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we
respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our
spirits and live! 10 Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they
thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his
holiness. 11 No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later
on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who
have been trained by it. 12 Therefore, strengthen your feeble arms and weak
knees. 13 "Make level paths for your feet," so that the lame may not be
disabled, but rather healed. 14 Make every effort to live in peace with all
men and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord. 15 See to it
that no one misses the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to
cause trouble and defile many. 16 See that no one is sexually immoral, or is
godless like Esau, who for a single meal sold his inheritance rights as the
oldest son. 17 Afterward, as you know, when he wanted to inherit this
blessing, he was rejected. He could bring about no change of mind, though he
sought the blessing with tears. 18 You have not come to a mountain that can
be touched and that is burning with fire; to darkness, gloom and storm; 19
to a trumpet blast or to such a voice speaking words that those who heard it
begged that no further word be spoken to them, 20 because they could not
bear what was commanded: "If even an animal touches the mountain, it must be
stoned." 21 The sight was so terrifying that Moses said, "I am trembling
with fear." 22 But you have come to Mount Zion, to the heavenly Jerusalem,
the city of the living God. You have come to thousands upon thousands of
angels in joyful assembly, 23 to the church of the firstborn, whose names
are written in heaven. You have come to God, the judge of all men, to the
spirits of righteous men made perfect, 24 to Jesus the mediator of a new
covenant, and to the sprinkled blood that speaks a better word than the
blood of Abel. 25 See to it that you do not refuse him who speaks. If they
did not escape when they refused him who warned them on earth, how much less
will we, if we turn away from him who warns us from heaven? 26 At that time
his voice shook the earth, but now he has promised, "Once more I will shake
not only the earth but also the heavens." 27 The words "once more" indicate
the removing of what can be shaken-- that is, created things-- so that what
cannot be shaken may remain. 28 Therefore, since we are receiving a kingdom
that cannot be shaken, let us be thankful, and so worship God acceptably
with reverence and awe, 29 for our "God is a consuming fire."

 I have not lost heart in this matter. However, I am very sad and in need of
 some counsel in this matter. I am 110% ready to come under the authority
of  the Christian Court and deal with my sin in this matter.

 My wife who is under the authority of Andy appears to want reconciliation
 without discipline. I believe the root of our differences lies in our sin
 and we need to first deal with our sin if we are to ever have "true" and
 "lasting" reconciliation and experience the intimacy that God wants for us
 in our marriage.

 I don't know where to turn at this point as I want a discipline process,
but the others seem not to. We have a court hearing on December 16th dealing
 with a matter of legal separation. I have asked my wife to withdraw her
 request before the court but she is not willing at this point.

 The Sins as I see them:
X:
 1)Not treating his wife as a weaker vessel using gentleness to teach and  correct her in order to present her complete in Christ.
 2) Sinning in my anger and frustration in the form of publicly slandering and gossiping (not my intent but the actual result) about those without
 going through the discipline process before publicly rebuking.
 3) Using foul language (in a specific situations) in my anger and frustration about what is happening.
 4) Showing disrespect to my pastor.
 5) Failing to love as Christ loved.
 I am sure there are many more and I am perfectly willing to repent of them as they are brought out.

Y
 1) Refusing to submit to and show respect for her husband. Not allowing her husband to be the priest of their home.
 2) Taking a dispute between believers before the ungodly court. And failing to repent when confronted gently.
 3) Failing to leave her father and mother and cleave to her husband. This  further complicates our matters as her father (non-believer in my opinion)
 has publicly stated "he is done with me" "is washing his hands of me" and wants no more communication.
 4) Entertaining a spirit of fear which is not of God and is used as  justification to proceed in the manner she is.

 X

12/08/03 to all:

http://www.peacemakers.net/unity/1corinthians7-12-13.htm

Unbelieving Spouse "pleased to dwell"
"1 Corinthians 7:12-13  12 But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any
brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with
him, let him not put her away.  13 And the woman which hath an husband that
believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave
him."   The following are different commentaries upon 1 Corinthians 7:12-13.

Matthew Henry 1 Corinthians 7:12-15

II. He brings the general advice home to the case of such as had an
unbelieving mate (v. 12): But to the rest speak I, not the Lord; that is,
the Lord had not so expressly spoken to this case as to the former divorce.
It does not mean that the apostle spoke without authority from the Lord, or
decided this case by his own wisdom, without the inspiration of the Holy
Ghost. He closes this subject with a declaration to the contrary (v. 40), I
think also that I have the Spirit of God. But, having thus prefaced his
advice, we may attend,

1. To the advice itself, which is that if an unbelieving husband or wife
were pleased to dwell with a Christian relative, the other should not
separate. The husband should not put away an unbelieving wife, nor the wife
leave an unbelieving husband, v. 12, 13. The Christian calling did not
dissolve the marriage covenant, but bind it the faster, by bringing it back
to the original institution, limiting it to two persons, and binding them
together for life. The believer is not by faith in Christ loosed from
matrimonial bonds to an unbeliever, but is at once bound and made apt to be
a better relative. But, though a believing wife or husband should not
separate from an unbelieving mate, yet if the unbelieving relative desert
the believer, and no means can reconcile to a cohabitation, in such a case a
brother or sister is not in bondage (v. 15), not tied up to the unreasonable
humour, and bound servilely to follow or cleave to the malicious deserter,
or not bound to live unmarried after all proper means for reconciliation
have been tried, at least of the deserter contract another marriage or be
guilty of adultery, which was a very easy supposition, because a very common
instance among the heathen inhabitants of Corinth. In such a case the
deserted person must be free to marry again, and it is granted on all hands.
And some think that such a malicious desertion is as much a dissolution of
the marriage-covenant as death itself.

For how is it possible that the two shall be one flesh when the one is
maliciously bent to part from or put away the other? Indeed, the deserter
seems still bound by the matrimonial contract; and therefore the apostle
says (v. 11), If the woman depart from her husband upon the account of his
infidelity, let her remain unmarried. But the deserted party seems to be
left more at liberty (I mean supposing all the proper means have been used
to reclaim the deserter, and other circumstances make it necessary) to marry
another person. It does not seem reasonable that they should be still bound,
when it is rendered impossible to perform conjugal duties or enjoy
conjugal comforts, through the mere fault of their mate: in such a case
marriage would be a state of servitude indeed. But, whatever liberty be
indulged Christians in such a case as this, they are not allowed, for the
mere infidelity of a husband or wife, to separate; but, if the unbeliever be
willing, they should continue in the relation, and cohabit as those who are
thus related. This is the apostle's general direction.

2. We have here the reasons of this advice.

    (1.) Because the relation or state is sanctified by the holiness of
either party: For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the
unbelieving wife by the husband (v. 14), or hath been sanctified. The
relation itself, and the conjugal use of each other, are sanctified to the
believer. To the pure all things are pure, Titus 1:15. Marriage is a divine
institution; it is a compact for life, by God's appointment. Had converse
and congress with unbelievers in that relation defiled the believer, or
rendered him or her offensive to God, the ends of marriage would have been
defeated, and the comforts of it in a manner destroyed, in the circumstances
in which Christians then were. But the apostle tells them that, though they
were yoked with unbelievers, yet, if they themselves were holy, marriage was
to them a holy state, and marriage comforts, even with an unbelieving
relative, were sanctified enjoyments. It was no more displeasing to God for
them to continue to live as they did before, with their unbelieving or
heathen relation, than if they had become converts together. If one of the
relatives had become holy, nothing of the duties or lawful comforts of the married state could defile them, and render
them displeasing to God, though the other were a heathen. He is sanctified
for the wife's sake. She is sanctified for the husband's sake.  Both are one
flesh. He is to be reputed clean who is one flesh with her that is holy, and
vice verse: Else were your children unclean, but now are they holy (v. 14),
that is, they would be heathen, out of the pale of the church and covenant
of God. They would not be of the holy seed (as the Jews are called, Isaiah
6:13), but common and unclean, in the same sense as heathens in general were
styled in the apostle's vision, Acts 10:28.

This way of speaking is according to the dialect of the Jews, among whom a
child begotten by parents yet heathens, was said to be begotten out of
holiness; and a child begotten by parents made proselytes was said to be
begotten intra sanctitatem - within the holy enclosure. Thus Christians are
called commonly saints; such they are by profession, separated to be a
peculiar people of God, and as such distinguished from the world; and
therefore the children born to Christians, though married to unbelievers,
are not to be reckoned as part of the world, but of the church, a holy, not
a common and unclean seed. "Continue therefore to live even with
unbelieving relatives; for, if you are holy, the relation is so, the state
is so, you may make a holy use even of an unbelieving relative, in conjugal
duties, and your seed will be holy too." What a comfort is this, where both
relatives are believers!

(2.) Another reason is that God hath called Christians to peace, v. 15. The
Christian religion obliges us to act peaceably in all relations, natural and
civil. We are bound, as much as in us lies, to live peaceably with all men
(Romans 12:18), and therefore surely to promote the peace and comfort of our
nearest relatives, those with whom we are one flesh, nay, though they should
be infidels. Note, It should be the labour and study of those who are
married to make each other as easy and happy as possible.

(3.) A third reason is that it is possible for the believing relative to be
an instrument of the other's salvation (v. 16): What knowest thou, O wife,
whether thou shalt save thy husband? Note, It is the plain duty of those in
so near a relation to seek the salvation of those to whom they are related.
"Do not separate. There is other duty now called for. The conjugal relation
calls for the most close and endeared affection; it is a contract for life.
And should a Christian desert a mate, when an opportunity offers to give the
most glorious proof of love? Stay, and labour heartily for the conversion of
thy relative. Endeavour to save a soul. Who knows but this may be the event?
It is not impossible. And, though there be no great probability, saving a
soul is so good and glorious a service that the bare possibility should put
one on exerting one's self." Note, Mere possibility of success should be a
sufficient motive with us to use our diligent endeavours for saving the
souls of our relations. "What know I but I may save his soul? should move me
to attempt it."

Barnes Notes:

1 Corinthians 7:10. And unto the married This verse commences the SECOND
subject of inquiry; to wit, whether it was proper, in the existing state of
things, for those who WERE married to continue this relation, or whether
they ought to separate. The REASONS why any may have supposed that it was
best to separate, may have been:

(1) That their troubles and persecutions might be such that they might judge
it best that families should be broken up; and,

(2) Probably many supposed that it was unlawful for a Christian wife or
husband to be connected at all with a pagan and an idolater. I command, yet
not I, but the Lord Not I so much as the Lord. This injunction is not to be
understood as ADVICE merely, but as a solemn, divine command, from which you
are not at liberty to depart. Paul here professes to utter the language of
inspiration, and demands obedience. The express command of "the Lord" to
which he refers, is probably the precept recorded in Matthew 5:32, and
19:3-10. These precepts of Christ asserted that the marriage tie was sacred
and inviolable. Let not the wife depart ... Let her not prove faithless to
her marriage vows; let her not, on any pretence, desert her husband. Though
she is a Christian, and he is not, yet let her not seek, on that account, to
be separate from him - The law of Moses did not permit a wife to divorce
herself from her husband, though it was sometimes done (compare Matthew
10:12); but the Greek and Roman laws allowed it - Grotius.

But Paul here refers to a formal and legal separation before the
magistrates, and not to a voluntary separation, without intending to be
formally divorced. The reasons for this opinion are:
(1) That such divorces were known and practiced among both Jews and pagans.
(2) It was important to settle the question whether they were to be allowed
in the Christian church.
(3) The claim would be set up, probably, that it might be done.
(4) The question whether a "voluntary separation" might not be proper, where
one party was a Christian, and the other not, he discusses in the following
verses, 1 Corinthians 7:12-17.

Here, therefore, he solemnly repeats the law of Christ, that DIVORCE, under
the Christian economy, was not to be in the power either of the husband or
wife.
1 Corinthians 7:11. But and if she depart If she have withdrawn by a rash
and foolish act; if she has attempted to dissolve the marriage vow, she is
to remain unmarried, or be reconciled. She is not at liberty to marry
another. This may refer, I suppose, to instances where wives, ignorant of
the rule of Christ, and supposing that they had a right to separate
themselves from their husbands, had rashly left them, and had supposed that
the marriage contract was dissolved. Paul tells them that this was
impossible; and that IF they had so separated from their husbands, the pure
laws of Christianity, did not recognize this right, and they must either be
reconciled to their husbands, or remain alone. The marriage tie was so
sacred that it could not be dissolved by the will of either party.

Let her remain unmarried That is, let her not marry another. Or be
reconciled to her husband Let this be done, if possible. If it cannot be,
let her remain unmarried. It was a DUTY to be reconciled if it was possible.
If not, she should not violate her vows to her husband so far as to marry
another. It is evident that this rule is still binding, and that no one who
has separated from her husband, whatever be the cause, unless there be a
regular divorce, according to the law of Christ (Matthew 5:32), can be at
liberty to marry again.

And let not the husband See the note at Matthew 5:32. This right, granted
under the Jewish law, and practiced among all the pagan, was to be taken
away wholly under the gospel. The marriage tie was to be regarded as sacred;
and the tyranny of man over woman was to cease. 1 Corinthians 7:12. But to
the rest "I have spoken in regard to the duties of the unmarried, and the
question whether it is right and advisable that they should marry, 1
Corinthians 7:1-9. I have also uttered the command of the Lord in regard to
those who are married, and the question whether separation and divorce were
proper. Now in regard to "the rest of the person's and cases" referred to, I
will deliver my opinion." "The rest," or remainder, here referred to,
relates particularly to the cases in which one party was a Christian and the
other not. In the previous verses he had delivered the solemn, explicit law
of Christ, that DIVORCE was to take place on neither side, and in no
instance, except agreeably to the law of Christ; Matthew 5:32. That was
settled by divine authority. In the subsequent verses he discusses a
different question; whether a "voluntary separation" was not advisable and
proper when the one party was a Christian and the other not. The word "rest"
refers to these instances, and the questions which would arise under this
inquiry.

Not the Lord See the note at 1 Corinthians 7:6. "I do not claim, in this
advice, to be under the influence of inspiration; I have no express command
on the subject from the Lord; but I deliver my opinion as a servant of the
Lord (1 Corinthians 7:40), and as having a right to offer advice, even when
I have no express command from God, to a church which I have founded, and
which has consulted me on the subject." This was a case in which both he and
they were to follow the principles of Christian prudence and propriety, when
there was no express commandment. Many such cases may occur. But few,
perhaps none, can occur, in which some Christian principle shall not be
found, that will be sufficient to direct the anxious inquirer after truth
and duty.

If any brother Any Christian, that believeth not That is not a Christian;
one who is a pagan. And if she be pleased If it seems best to her; if she
consents; approves of living together still. There might be many cases where the wife or the
husband, that was not a Christian, would be so opposed to Christianity, and
so violent in their opposition, that they would not be willing to live with
a Christian. When this was the case, the Christian husband or wife could not
prevent the separation. When this was not the case, they were not to seek a
separation themselves.

To dwell with him To remain in connection with him as his wife, though they
differed on the subject of religion.  Let him not put her away Though she is
a pagan, though opposed to his religion, yet the marriage vow is sacred and
inviolable. It is not to be sundered by any change which can take place in
the opinions of either party. It is evident that if a man were at liberty to
dissolve the marriage tie, or to discard his wife when his own opinions were
changed on the subject of religion, that it would at once destroy all the
sacredness of the marriage union, and render it a nullity. Even, herefore,
when there is a difference of opinion on the vital subject of religion, the
tie is not dissolved; but the only effect of religion should be, to make the
converted husband or wife more tender, kind, affectionate, and faithful than
they were before; and all the more so as their partners are without the
hopes of the gospel, and as they may be won to love the Saviour, 1
Corinthians 7:16.

1 Corinthians 7:13. Let her not leave him. A change of phraseology from the
last verse, to suit the circumstances. The wife did not have power to "put
away" the husband, and expel him from his own home; but she might think it
her duty to be separated from him. The apostle counsels her not to do this;
and this advice should still be followed. She should still love her husband
and seek his welfare; she should be still a kind, affectionate, and faithful
wife; and all the more so that she may show him the excellence of religion,
and win him to love it. She should even bear much, and bear it long; nor
should she leave him unless her life is rendered miserable, or in danger; or
unless he wholly neglects to make provision for her, and leaves her to
suffering, to want, and to tears. In such a case no precept of religion
forbids her to return to her father's house, or to seek a place of safety
and of comfort. But even then it is not to be a separation on account of a
difference of religious sentiment, but for brutal treatment. Even then the
marriage tie is not dissolved, and neither party is at liberty to marry
again.

Dr. Jay E. Adams...

Christian counselor's Commentary by Jay E. Adams; pg 50; 1 Corinthians 7:15 http://www.timelesstexts.com

"May the believing partner instigate the divorce?  It would seem so.  The
Greek of verse 15 reads, literally, 'if the unbeliever is separarating,'
that is, if he is in the process of breaking up the marriage.  Certainly it
would refer to actions (or lack of actions) on his part that would indicate
he no longer wishes to be married and probably also pertains to a failure to
assume the obligations of marriage.  According to Exodus 21:10, minimal
requirements for a marriage on the husband's part are food, clothing (or
shelter) and sexual relations.  When these are not provided by neglect or
refusal, the marriage may be terminated by the other party.  At any rate,
the overarching principle is that failure on the part of a marriage partner
to maintain the semblance of a home, in such a way that it is constantly
upset by such failure, provides opportunity for divorce, leading to 'peace'
for the Christian partner."

Dear Sir,
I don't know who you are or "think you are" but I am not going to be responding to your emails.  I have visited your web site and I don't think
you are an appropriate intermediary for this process.
Sincerely,

Andy Snodgrass
Senior Pastor Fox Island Alliance Church

12/08/03

Dear steward,
Please do not cotact me any further.
Sincerely,
Y (wife)

 H2 STATEMENT ON MARRIAGE—DIVORCE—REMARRIAGE PREAMBLE

That the purpose of this statement be clear is imperative to its proper consideration. As an “instructional statement of The Christian and Missionary Alliance,” it is intended as an expositional guideline of common understanding to which the 1977 General Council (Calgary, Alberta, Canada) could subscribe as a basis on which to agree or disagree with grace and forbearance.  For some, the interpretation may be too broad and for others, too confining. But a common standard is needed in order to deal adequately with the issues of divorce and remarriage. The position set forth here neither promotes divorce nor weakens the scriptural stance represented in former legislation. The Commission on Divorce Study endeavored neither to take from nor to add to scriptural teaching on divorce.

INSTRUCTIONAL STATEMENT OF THE CHRISTIAN AND MISSIONARY ALLIANCE*

1. Introduction.

a. More and more marriages are failing; divorces and remarriages are becoming increasingly common. If couples who live together without the benefit of a registered marriage contract and then separate are counted, half the marriages that take place today in North America fail.

b. Yet marriage is an essential, sacred institution, a cornerstone of society. It was established by God Himself when the Lord said, . . . It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make an help meet for him (Genesis 2:18), and marriage has enjoyed divine sanction and blessing across the centuries. Ephesians 5 reveals the sacredness of marriage when the union between Christ and the Church is used to illustrate the husband-wife relationship.

c. Therefore, the Church today must do everything in its power to encourage and maintain the institution of marriage and on God-given grounds. Some today would set standards for conduct in this area other than by the authority of the Word of God. Among even those who seek to hold to biblical authority are divergent opinions, particularly with respect to the right of divorced persons to remarry. It seems imperative, therefore, that The Christian and Missionary Alliance set forth what we understand to be the scriptural teaching on these subjects.

d. This statement is designed not to answer all questions and cover all situations but to provide guidelines from which can be drawn scriptural applications to varying situations. This has been written with the social conditions of North America in view. Consequently, some adaptation may be necessary in countries overseas because of special social situations.

2. Marriage.

a. God instituted marriage as an honorable estate (Hebrews 13:4) for the blessing of companionship (Genesis 2:18) and as a continuation of the divine work of creation in the history of the human race (Genesis 4:1). Marriage is not a requirement for perfection of personhood nor is it a necessity for fulfillment in God’s highest purpose. Marriage may, in fact, hamper a person’s unconditional readiness for the call of God, and there are those who have the gift of refraining from marriage (Matthew 19:12, 1 Corinthians 7:7).

b. God intended marriage to be a monogamous, lifelong union as clearly implied in Genesis 2:24, Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. Jesus recalled this original order of creation to overthrow the lax interpretation and practice of the Mosaic law (Mark 10:6ff). Although polygamy was sometimes practiced in Old Testament times, the Bible makes clear that God intended marriage to exist between one man and one woman for as long as both of them remain alive. In Romans 7:2 the apostle Paul wrote, For the woman which hath an husband is bound by the law to her husband so long as he liveth; but if the husband be dead, she is loosed from the law of her husband (also 1 Corinthians 7:39).

c. The strict and lofty terms with which the marriage bond is described in the New Testament has its primary focus on human fellowship and the family. For the Christian the basis of all marital love is the love of Christ for the Church (Ephesians 5:31ff). Marriage is constituted first in mutual covenant. Marriage is a solemn, binding agreement entered into before God and man (Malachi 2:14). Ezekiel 16:8 uses marriage to illustrate the relationship between God and Israel and speaks of this relationship as a covenant entered into on the basis of swearing or an oath or a pledge. Jesus, in John 2, sanctioned by His presence a marriage being recognized and solemnized by a public celebration. Therefore, men and women should enter marriage with a legal contract and pledged vows, preferably under the administration of a Christian minister, not just by deciding to start to live together.

d. Marriage is a physical union. This is clearly set forth by the apostle Paul in I Corinthians 6:16ff. Marriage is designed to be a unity of flesh and spirit and represents the wholeness of that unity (1 Thessalonians 4:3–5). In 2 Corinthians 12:19–21 the apostle Paul warns the Corinthian church that impenitence of those who committed sexual immorality would necessitate his intervention.

e. In no case ought any person to enter into any so-called “marriage” with a person of the same sex. Homosexual unions are specifically forbidden in Scripture and are described manifestations of the basest forms of sinful conduct which degrade human dignity and desecrate God’s creational design (Leviticus 20:13, Romans 1:26–27, 32, 1 Corinthians 6:9).

f. A Christian should not marry a person who does not know Christ as personal Savior. 2 Corinthians 6:14 is explicit, Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers . . . . The final few words of 1 Corinthians 7:39 suggest the same standard; widows who remarry are told to do so only in the Lord. Love for Christ is never to have second place (Matthew 6:33).

3. Divorce.

a. Divorce is a departure from the purposes of God. While in the Old Testament divorce was allowed and was apparently easily secured. This, like polygamy, was contrary to God’s highest intentions. Jesus explained that provisions for divorce in the Old Testament were an accommodation to “the hardness” of people’s hearts and a necessary evil (Matthew 19:8). The prophet Malachi declared, For I hate divorce, says the Lord the God of Israel . . . (Malachi 2:16, RSV). Jesus said, What therefore God hath joined together, let no man put asunder (Matthew 19:6, also Mark 10:6–9). The Church, therefore, should seek always to discourage divorce as a solution to marital problems. The Bible teaches that even when a Christian is married to a nonbeliever, the Christian should continue to live with his/her mate if at all possible (1 Corinthians 7:12–13).

b. While divorce is always contrary to God’s intentions, there are certain circumstances when it is permitted. Jesus said in Matthew 5:32 and again in Matthew 19:9 that a person is not to divorce his/her mate except for the cause of fornication. The Greek word used for “fornication” refers to habitual sexual immorality for which the synonym “whoredom” may be used, implying all kinds of immorality, including adultery which desecrates the marriage relationship—a view generally accepted by Greek scholars.

c. The absence of this allowance in Mark 10:6–12 and Luke 16:18 does not set aside the practical conditions for carrying out the Mosaic practice of divorce in the new age Christ establishes. But He makes a sharper interpretation which handles the problem of divorce as a lesser evil to the continuation of an impossible situation. Divorce is expressly denied for the immediate purpose of marrying someone else (Mark 10:11–12). It is incumbent, therefore, that a believer entertain divorce only as a last resort and because of violations through fornication—never as a reason to marry someone else. When one partner of a divorce has become involved in adultery, the offended mate is permitted, though not required, to get a divorce. If an unsaved husband/wife refuses to continue to live with his/her mate and departs, the believer may agree to this separation. But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases . . . (1 Corinthians 7:15). Such separations may result in divorce, and in that event the Christian is guilty of no wrong.

4. Remarriage.

a. The remarriage of persons who have been divorced is permitted by Scripture under certain circumstances. If, after being divorced, one of the original marriage partners dies, the remaining partner is free to remarry. Romans 7:2 and 1 Corinthians 7:39 make clear that death dissolves the marriage relationship.

b. When an adulterous relationship has brought about a divorce, the party that is innocent of adultery has a right to remarry. The words of Jesus, . . . Whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, implies the right of remarriage. When He adds, . . . And whosoever shall marry her that is divorced (the guilty party) committeth adultery (Matthew 5:32), the right to marry anyone guilty of adultery is denied and also to marry anyone who obtained divorce for the express purpose of remarriage (Mark 10:11–12).

c. The consistency between the Old Testament and the New Testament is recognized as Jesus interpreted it. The passage in Deuteronomy from which Jesus quoted in Matthew 5:31 and Mark 10:2–12 indicates that the “putting away” of a wife dissolves the marriage and allows remarriage. Jesus did not change the nature of divorce as dissolving marriage and permitting remarriage; He simply rejected all rationalization and excuse for divorce and made clear that only the innocent party whose former marriage was revoked by divorce could remarry without guilt.

d. According to the teaching of 1 Corinthians 7, which permits divorce when an unbelieving husband/wife of a believer “departs” (Section 3c), remarriage on grounds of desertion alone is not permitted according to verse 11, But, and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.” In other words, if the unbelieving, deserting party is not deceased and does not remarry, neither should the one who has been deserted remarry.

e. When two unbelievers have been divorced and one is subsequently converted and neither has remarried, the Christian should attempt to restore the marriage. If the non-Christian refuses, this makes the marriage the same as the kind described in 1 Corinthians 7:15.

f. If a person is divorced on other than the above scriptural grounds and his/her former partner remarries, that partner by remarrying has, according to scriptural standards (Matthew 5:32, 19:9), committed adultery and has dissolved the original relationship.

g. Remarriage is never commanded; it is in some cases only permitted. Divorced persons who have scriptural grounds for remarriage should enter into such remarriage only with the greatest caution. Seldom is there a marriage failure for any cause in which one of the partners is “completely innocent.” The applicant for remarriage should demonstrate an attitude of repentance for any part he/she may have had in the original failure. He/she should receive counseling from the church so as to avoid repeating destructive attitudes and actions.

h. Persons who remarry after being divorced on other than scriptural grounds are guilty before God of adultery. Jesus said in Matthew 5:32, . . . Whosoever shall put away his wife, saving for the cause of fornication, causeth her to commit adultery: and whosoever shall marry her that is divorced committeth adultery. Such marriages should not be performed by a Christian clergyman.

i. Persons who have been divorced on other than scriptural grounds who subsequently become Christians are not absolved from the necessity to remain unmarried by having become Christians. While it is true that we are made new creatures in Christ, we continue to bear legal and moral responsibilities that existed before conversion. A person, for example, that contracted a debt as a non-Christian is not absolved of an obligation to pay that debt by becoming a believer. A man who brought children into this world as a non- Christian must still provide for those children after his conversion. A man who contracted a marriage while a non-Christian must honor the terms of that marriage contract even after he is in Christ.

j. Persons who were divorced and remarried without scriptural grounds prior to conversion should not feel obligated after conversion to withdraw from the subsequent marriage. The remarriage that was entered into wrongly constituted an act of adultery that broke the former marriage. With his/her former marriage having been dissolved, the remarried person is responsible to be faithful to his/her new contract. Having broken the former marriage, he/she is “living in adultery only” if he/she is unfaithful to his/her present marriage contract.

k. Persons who are divorced or divorced and remarried on scriptural grounds are entitled to the full privileges of fellowship and membership in the church. A believer who was divorced or divorced and remarried on other than scriptural grounds while still a nonbeliever should likewise be received into full Christian fellowship. The grace of God in Christ forgives all sin; the person in Christ is a new creation.

l. Discretion, however, must be exercised in the choice of divorced and remarried persons for places of leadership in the church. While all believers are equal members of the body of Christ, not all members are qualified equally for every office in the church. The offices of elder (spiritual leader) and deacon (business leader) in the church are to be filled by those of high moral and spiritual qualifications, whose pattern of exemplary Christian living is so established that it may be followed.

m. A believer who knowingly secures a divorce on other than scriptural grounds, or a believer who knowingly marries someone who was divorced on other than scriptural grounds, or a believer whose divorce was granted on other than scriptural grounds and who remarries should be disciplined by the church and be granted the full privileges of Christian fellowship only after a demonstration of genuine repentance for deliberate departure from scriptural standards.

 Last Revision Council 1977 H2-5  MARRIAGE—DIVORCE—REMARRIAGE • STATEMENT 2003 EDITION *Unless otherwise noted, Scripture quotations throughout this section are from the King James Version of the Bible. H2-6 Last Revision Council 1977

E8 UNIFORM POLICY ON DISCIPLINE,RESTORATION, AND APPEAL PREAMBLE

 Discipline is an exercise of scriptural authority for which the church is responsible. The Christian and Missionary Alliance (C&MA) believes the Scriptures establish standards of conduct and belief by which members of a C&MA church and individuals serving Christ through licensed ministry within the C&MA must live. The goals of discipline are to preserve the honor of God; to protect the purity of the Church; to guard other Christians from being tempted, misled, divided, or otherwise harmed; and to bring fallen Christians to repentance. Discipline is administered to achieve restoration, while also providing for the spiritual welfare of the local church. Discipline is to be corrective and redemptive and to be exercised under a dispensation of mercy. Restoration does not necessarily result in a reinstatement of credentials and/or local church membership.

The Uniform Policy on Discipline, Restoration, and Appeal (Policy) and the disciplinary proceedings are ecclesiastical in nature, founded on the most sacred teachings of the Christian faith. The Policy and proceedings seek to guide the behavior and belief of persons holding positions of authority and leadership within the Christian Church and to monitor the relationship of those persons in the Christian Church. In addition, they seek to regulate the behavior and belief of members of C&MA churches who, by their membership, have submitted to the authority and discipline of the church. In any case of disagreement or dispute concerning the proceedings followed, or the decisions made under or in application of the Policy, the jurisdiction to decide such matters lies only with the vice president for the Division of National Church Ministries (NCM) and only as provided in the Policy. Appeal before a civil tribunal is not permitted.

The Policy is not intended to create a legally enforceable contract or promise. The Board of Directors of the C&MA reserves the right, in its sole discretion, to modify the Policy at any time and for any reason.

I BIBLICAL BASIS FOR DISCIPLINE

1. Growth in Faith. Discipline serves to encourage growth and development in faith. Rebuke them sharply, so that they will be sound in faith . . . (Titus 1:13).

2. Redemption and Restoration. Discipline serves to spiritually redeem and restore those who have fallen into immoral or otherwise unChrist-like ways. Brothers, if someone is caught in a sin, you who are spiritual should restore him gently (Galatians 6:1). If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over . . . (Matthew 18:15).

3. Bearing Another’s Burden. Discipline benefits the church because it teaches the church to be redemptive by carrying the burden of seeking to restore fallen believers. Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ (Galatians 6:2).

4. Forgiveness, Comfort, Love. Discipline involves compassion, even for those who have committed wrongful acts and espoused beliefs contrary to Scripture. . . . you ought to forgive and comfort him, so that he will not be overwhelmed by excessive sorrow (2 Corinthians 2:5-7).

5. Warning to the Divisive. Discipline serves to deter and instruct against beliefs and conduct contrary to Scripture. Warn a divisive person once, and then warn him a second time. After that, have nothing to do with him (Titus 3:10).

6. Judgment and Expulsion. Discipline may lead to judgment, including expulsion from the church. . . . Are you not to judge those inside (the church)? God will judge those outside. "Expel the wicked man from among you" (1 Corinthians 5:12, 13).

II SCOPE OF THE POLICY

1. Persons Subject to Discipline. This Policy applies to all workers licensed within the C&MA as defined by the Constitution and Bylaws, policies, and regulations of the C&MA; certified non-clergy professionals; officers, employees, and elected personnel of the national C&MA entity, district entity, and church entity; and all members of C&MA churches.

2. Submission of a Charge. The disciplinary process is initiated by a written and signed charge submitted in person or by certified mail. A charge may be submitted through its governance authority (as defined below) by any entity within the C&MA, such as the denomination, district, and church; or a charge may be submitted by any two licensed workers within the C&MA or members of a C&MA church as long as the individuals are not members of the same immediate family. (Two persons are in the same immediate family if their relationship is one of husband and wife, parent and child, brother and sister, or grandparent and grandchild.) In the case of sexual misconduct or child/ vulnerable adult abuse, any one person, whether or not part of the C&MA, may submit a written charge. Any person(s) making false statements in submitting a charge or providing false information in a disciplinary proceeding may be subject to discipline or other actions at the discretion of the governance authority.

3. Governance Authority. Disciplinary proceedings will be initiated and administered by one of the following governance authorities:

a. If the charge relates to a licensed worker or certified non-clergy professional, the governance authority will be the person who licensed/certified the individual.
b. If the charge relates to an employee of the U.S. C&MA National Office or any district office, the governance authority will be the "president" of the entity.
c. If the charge relates to a member or unlicensed employee of a local C&MA church (excluding licensed worker or certified non-clergy personnel), the authority will be the chairman of the Board of Elders. Note: The chairman of the elders is usually the senior pastor unless he has chosen an elder to assume the position.

 4. Basis of Discipline. Matters that may give rise to discipline include but are not limited to:

a. Holding to and/or promulgating doctrines contrary to the fundamental tenets of the Christian faith as outlined in the C&MA Statement of Faith.
b. Defiance or failure to submit to constituted authority as defined by the Board of Directors of the C&MA.
c. Moral failure involving sexual misconduct.
d. Moral or ethical failure other than sexual misconduct.
e. Theft, misappropriation of funds or property, and other financial transgressions.
f. Dishonesty, fraud, perjury, and other misrepresentations.
g. Spreading false rumors about another.
h. Violence or abuse directed toward others, especially a child or vulnerable adult.
i. Interference in the current ministry of a church by a former pastor or former member, provided the former member is an active member of another Alliance church.
j. Judgment of guilty by a civil or criminal court of law, excluding minor traffic violations.

 III. GENERAL PROCEDURES AND CONSIDERATIONS

1. Investigators and Committee Members. Investigators and members of the Committee on Discipline will be persons respected for their integrity, spiritual stature, capability of communicating loving concern, and lack of bias in the case at hand (Galatians 6:1,2). A member of the Sensitive Issues Consultative Group or another qualified professional may be requested to consult with any committee in the disciplinary process at the discretion of the governance authority.

2. Tone of Discipline Procedures. Disciplinary proceedings will be conducted with compassion for all affected and "in the spirit of meekness." While it is necessary to ask difficult questions, investigators and Committee members must set aside personal feelings about the individuals involved, focus on the evidence gathered and presented, and seek guidance in the Scriptures and through prayer.

3. Confidentiality and Disclosure. Disciplinary proceedings will be conducted with confidentiality in all aspects of the proceedings; however, there is no guarantee of confidentiality within disciplinary proceedings for any participant. It may be necessary to disclose the facts and circumstances of the charge, including the identities of the accused and those submitting the charge, in connection with investigating and remedying the charge and considering and carrying out possible restoration. In addition, the findings and conclusions of the disciplinary proceeding may be announced to appropriate parties who were an integral part of the proceedings, affected members of the church congregation, and licensed workers associated with the body that originally licensed the charged worker. If the investigator or a member of the Committee on Discipline is contacted by the press, law enforcement authorities, attorney or other individual associated with civil/criminal proceedings, or other persons not involved with the disciplinary proceedings but seeking information, the governance authority responsible for the case will be contacted immediately. No information will be disclosed without the permission of the governance authority. The findings, conclusions, and records of the disciplinary proceedings may be communicated to churches and entities within the C&MA for decisions concerning employment, volunteer service, ministry work, church membership, and licensed worker’s status. A record of the findings and conclusions will be entered in the licensed worker file and may be conveyed with the file if the licensed worker seeks to transfer from one C&MA organization to another. In like manner, the record of a lay member may be transferred to another Alliance entity when determined appropriate by the governance authority who conducted the disciplinary proceeding. Information may be transmitted even after restoration to the individual’s former position or status.

4. Relationship to Employment. In the case of an individual employed by a C&MA entity or by a district or church entity, information presented in the disciplinary proceeding may be conveyed to the appropriate managing supervisor of the employee and may affect the employment relationship independent of the disciplinary proceeding. Also, the information may form the basis for a charge or complaint under another C&MA policy or regulation. An individual subject to a charge or disciplinary proceeding may be immediately suspended from employment or public ministry, or subject to other personnel action as determined by the governance authority. This Policy is not intended to create an expressed or implied contract of employment, to require the procedures of this Policy be followed before any action is taken, or to otherwise modify the at-will employment relationship which may exist between the employee and the employing entity.

IV. PROCEDURES FOR DISCIPLINARY PROCEEDINGS

1. Preliminary Inquiry. Reports or complaints of alleged violations (see Section II, item 4) or confessions by church members and/or licensed workers will be subjected to a preliminary inquiry by the governance authority, or his designee, to determine whether the charges have been properly brought, as outlined below.

a. Interview with Complainant(s). The person(s) who signed the written charge will be interviewed to ascertain the facts and to clarify any portions of the written charge.
b. Interview with the Defendant. The defendant will be interviewed regarding the charges. Prior to the interview, the defendant will be provided a copy of the written charge and informed of the right to submit a written response to the charge. An oral statement of confession, a statement of intent to resign one’s ministry, return credentials and/or membership in The Christian and Missionary Alliance, or an oral decision to immediately resign one’s ministry, return credentials and/or membership in The Christian and Missionary Alliance, will be recorded by the governance authority. However, the governance authority shall continue the investigation process as outlined herein with or without the cooperation of the defendant.
c. Proper Submission of Charge. If it is determined the charge was submitted properly under this Policy, the governance authority will proceed with a formal investigation as outlined below. If it is determined the charge was not submitted properly, the charge will be dismissed and all involved personnel notified. A charge is not properly submitted if it is not a basis for discipline, if the defendant is not subject to discipline, or if the charging party(ies) has no standing to submit a charge.
d. Rights of Governance Authority. The governance authority, at its sole discretion, may dismiss or delay the formal investigation of a charge of a private dispute regarding matters not normally considered a basis for discipline. In such instances the governance authority will provide instructions on resolving the matters according to Matthew 18:15, 16.
e. Request for Review. If a charge is dismissed, the charging party may request review of the dismissal decision as outlined in Section X below.

2. Formal Investigation. When required, the governance authority will appoint two or more persons (at the local church, elders) to conduct an investigation of the charge. A female may be appointed when the defendant or primary complainant is a woman. The appointment of the investigators will be by letter, and a copy of the letter will be provided to the defendant and the next level of jurisdiction. Normally, the investigation will be completed within thirty days from the date of appointment and will include:

a. Interview with the person(s) making the charge.
b. Interview with the defendant. Unwillingness to appear at a scheduled interview without acceptable reason will be noted in the report. The governance authority shall continue the investigation as outlined herein.
c. Interview with witnesses identified by the person(s) making the charge and the defendant.
d. Review of any written statements provided by the defendant and any documents presented by the person(s) making the charge, the defendant, or any other person identified as having relevant information.
e. Collection and review of other documentary evidence relevant to the charge. The investigators will determine the scope of investigation. Interviews with the person(s) making the charge, victims of the alleged wrongful conduct (if they did not submit the charge), and the defendant will be conducted by at least two investigators. Summary of Investigation. The investigators will prepare a written report of the investigation including a summary of evidence relevant to the charges, specific charges substantiated by the evidence, and recommendations. A copy will be provided to the person(s) making the charge, the defendant, and the governance authority.

3. Intermediate Action by Governance Authority. Upon receipt of the report of investigation, the governance authority will take one of the following actions.
a. If the governance authority determines the charge is unsubstantiated, and there is no reasonable basis for proceeding with a hearing, a letter will be provided to the person(s) making the charge, the defendant, and all appropriate personnel who had knowledge of the allegation(s). The charging party(ies) may request a review of the decision to dismiss according to Section X below.
b. If it is determined the charge is substantiated, the governance authority, in addition to appointing a minimum of five persons to serve as members of the Committee on Discipline, will serve as the moderator and will provide copies of the following documents: the written charge, the written response statement, if any, and the investigation summary. One member who served on the original Committee on Investigation will serve as prosecutor without vote and will be excused prior to deliberations. If the Committee determines the charges are undisputed or admitted, the hearing may be limited to specific issues such as questions addressing the penalty to be assessed and the appropriateness of the plan of restoration.

4. Scheduling the Hearing. As soon as possible following appointment, the moderator will schedule a disciplinary hearing at a date and time mutually agreeable to the defendant and others participating in the hearing. Normally, the hearing will be conducted within thirty days of the moderator’s appointment.

5. Prehearing Conference. A prehearing conference may be (and will be if the defendant requests) set by the moderator no later than one week prior to the hearing. The purpose of the conference is to narrow the number and scope of disputed issues and to plan for an orderly hearing. At that time the prosecutor and defendant will identify all probable witnesses and give a summary of their anticipated testimony.

V. DISCIPLINARY HEARING

1. Committee on Discipline. The Committee on Discipline will make decisions by majority vote and determine its own procedure as consistent with this Policy.
a. Moderator. The moderator will be responsible for the orderly conduct of the hearing and may rule on all procedural questions, subject to the majority vote of the Committee.
b. Secretary. A secretary will be appointed by the moderator to keep accurate records of all proceedings and to preserve all documents submitted to the Committee.
c. Prosecutor. The prosecutor will present the witnesses and documents relevant to the charge. An effort will be made to present only the witnesses and documents of greatest relevance to the issues raised in the charge, both favorable and unfavorable to the defendant. If possible, repetitive testimony will be avoided.

2. Defendant. The defendant may recall witnesses presented by the prosecutor, call additional witnesses, provide additional testimony on his/her behalf, and/or submit a written statement at the time of the hearing. The defendant will have the right to an advocate at the hearing and may choose a colleague, Christian friend, or member of the church. Since this is an ecclesiastical hearing, legal counsel of any kind is not acceptable. If unable to be present at a scheduled hearing, the defendant may request the advocate to appear in his/her place or may request a rescheduling of the hearing. Unwillingness to appear or be represented at an agreed-upon hearing without acceptable reason may be considered an implication of the guilt of the defendant. The absence of the defendant or advocate at any hearing will not prevent the Committee on Discipline from proceeding with the hearing.

3. Witnesses. Witnesses may be examined by the prosecutor, defendant (and defendant’s advocate, if any), and one or more members of the Committee on Discipline.

4. Questioning of Testimony. Any Committee member, including the moderator, may ask questions of any person testifying. One or more members of the Committee (usually not the moderator) may be selected to question the defendant and any witnesses on behalf of the Committee.

5. Recordings as Evidence. A recording will be made of everything said during the hearing and may be used during the hearing, Committee deliberations, and appeal. Tape recordings and other types of magnetic recordings will be admitted as evidence only if the recordings had been made with the full knowledge of those giving testimony or being charged. The names of all individuals whose voices are recorded will be given at the beginning of the recorded testimony. Recordings may be made of any sessions of investigation.

6. Persons Present. Persons present during the hearing will only include the Committee on Discipline, the prosecutor, the charging party(ies), the defendant, and one witness at a time while testifying. The defendant’s spouse and advocate may be present while any testimony is being given.

7. Record of Proceedings. The record of the proceedings and the supporting documents, after being properly signed by the secretary and moderator, will be given into the custody of the moderator. If an appeal is made, the records will be forwarded to the proper and returned to the moderator after use.

8. Hearing Steps.
a. Reading the charge.
b. Defendant’s response to the charge.
c. Presentation of the prosecutor’s evidence.
d. Presentation of the defense.
e. Statement by the prosecutor.
f. Defendant summation.
g. Prosecutor summation.
h. Deliberation of the Committee on Discipline in executive session and a decision on each charge. A majority vote is required for a decision of guilty.
i. Judgment of the Committee on Discipline. The Committee will submit its decision in writing with respect to each charge and the discipline to be imposed, and will advise the defendant of the right to appeal and the process to be followed. Each member of the Committee will sign the document and a signed copy will be given to the defendant. A copy will be forwarded to the next higher level of jurisdiction. The Committee may announce its decision at the conclusion of the hearing or later in its written decision. Usually, the Committee’s written decision will be prepared and issued following the conclusion of the hearing.

VI. PENALTIES AND RESTORATION

1. One of the following forms of discipline will be imposed for any offense for which a defendant is found guilty.

a. Reprimand. Reprimand is the lowest degree of censure and consists of reproving, warning, and exhorting the offender to a more consistent walk with the Lord. This form of discipline may be applied to all persons subject to this Policy, including employees who are neither church members nor licensed/certified workers. The official relationship with a C&MA church or status as a licensed/certified worker is not altered. The governance authority will administrate the discipline.
b. Probation. During the period of probation the defendant’s relationship with the church and/or the privileges and responsibilities of ministry and/or employment may be limited as determined by the Committee on Discipline. This form of discipline may be applied to all persons subject to this Policy, including employees who are neither church members nor licensed/certified workers. The duration of the probation will be set by the Committee in view of the circumstances of the case but usually will not exceed six months. During the probation the defendant will meet regularly with a spiritual advisor appointed by the governance authority, will daily live a life above reproach as directed by the Committee, and will prove himself/herself before God and the church. The Committee may impose other conditions of probation. During the probation the Committee may impose more stringent discipline if it determines the defendant has not progressed appropriately. At the conclusion of the probation the Committee will evaluate whether evidence of genuine repentance and other expected progress have been achieved (as defined in 2 Corinthians 7:10,11). If progress has not occurred, the defendant may be subject to revocation or expulsion.
c. Revocation. Revocation applies to licensed/certified workers and church members, but usually does not apply to persons who are employees only. During revocation the defendant’s privileges and responsibilities as a licensed/certified worker will be discontinued. For laity, all public ministries will be discontinued. Further, the official worker license and other certifications (except ordination) will be surrendered to the governance authority. The Committee on Discipline will determine the appropriate duration for revocation, usually from six months to two years. In all cases of sexual moral failure, however, the period of revocation will not be less than two years. The Committee may extend the period of revocation but may initiate expulsion if determined the defendant has not progressed appropriately. The Committee may require regular meetings with a spiritual advisor and may impose other conditions as appropriate. The governance authority may lift the revocation after evidence of genuine repentance and other expected progress have been achieved and a request for restoration received. If restoration is not filed within the required thirty-day period of time, the person will remain classified under revocation indefinitely. If in the future the person shows evidence of repentance and requests to be placed in the restoration process, restoration (as outlined in Section VIII below) may be initiated. Reinstatement is then requested after the originally established period of revocation and the approved plan of restoration have been completed.
d. Expulsion. Expulsion is the most severe penalty that may be handed down by the Committee on Discipline. A decision to impose expulsion will be automatically appealed to the next higher level of jurisdiction (as defined in Section IX.2. below) before becoming effective. Expulsion applies to licensed/certified workers and church members, but usually does not apply to persons who are employees only. Expulsion results in the permanent discontinuation of all rights, responsibilities, and privileges of membership in the local church and the automatic withdrawal of the Certificate of Membership. For licensed/certified workers, expulsion results in the permanent discontinuation of all credentials and all rights, privileges, and responsibilities associated with the status. It will result in the automatic withdrawal of ordination.

2. In addition to or in lieu of the above penalties, the Committee on Discipline, at its discretion, may impose requirements on the terms and conditions of the employment, including but are not limited to personnel action such as adjustment in job duties, transfer, demotion, or reassignment; disciplinary action; and/or immediate termination of employment. This Policy is not intended to create an express or implied contract of employment, to require the procedures of this Policy be followed before any action is taken, or to otherwise modify the at-will employment relationship which may exist between the employee and the employing entity.

VII. DETERMINATION OF SEVERITY OF DISCIPLINE The facts and circumstances of an individual case determine what discipline will be imposed. If the offense is isolated and considered relatively minor with no actual harm to others, then a less severe discipline may be appropriate. If the offense involves flagrant misconduct, maliciousness, gross rejection of scriptural principles or C&MA doctrine, failure to submit to constituted authority, repeated incidents, or a pattern of wrongful behavior involving harm to others, then a more severe discipline may be deemed necessary. Evidence of remorse and repentance and a genuine desire to change, especially if occurring prior to the disciplinary proceeding, may be grounds to opt for a lesser penalty. In determining the discipline to be imposed, the Committee on Discipline will seek guidance in Scripture and through prayer and will seek to promote the purity and faith of the spiritual body of believers while striving to promote growth and restoration in the defendant.

VIII. RESTORATION PROCESS

1. Determination of Restoration. If the penalty imposed on the defendant is revocation, the Committee on Discipline will consider whether a plan for restoration is appropriate. If the penalty is expulsion, the Committee will admonish the person to become reconciled with God but will not initiate or oversee a plan for restoration.
a. Reinstatement to licensed ministry or church membership is not guaranteed.
b. In rare instances the Committee may determine the defendant’s conduct was so heinous and the defendant’s attitude so contrary to Christian principles that reinstatement to licensed ministry, church membership, and/or other public ministry is not possible at any time.
c. Restoration will not involve an agreement by the governance authority, Committee on Discipline, employing entity, or any other person involved in the disciplinary proceeding to withhold information concerning the proceeding, including the results, in the event the restored individual seeks new church membership or a new position with the denominational, district, or church entity, or an auxiliary organization of the C&MA.

2. Restoration Process/Plan.
a. The individual seeking restoration will:
(1) Develop a plan for restoration within thirty days of the rendering of the verdict and obtain approval for the plan by the governance authority. However, in rare instances, the governance authority will grant permission to receive, approve, and direct plan implementation at any time before and after the thirty-day time frame. A plan for restoration may be submitted to the governance authority in another community if the individual seeking restoration has relocated. In this situation the governance authority receiving the plan for restoration will obtain and review the record of the original disciplinary proceeding and, if possible, consult with the original governance authority and/or members of the Committee on Discipline to become informed regarding the history of the case.
(2) Where appropriate, engage in ongoing fellowship in an Alliance church which has been approved by the Committee.

b. The governance authority will:
(1) Provide oversight and direction.
(2) Outline the specific process of restoration and the expectations and requirements.
(3) Appoint an advisor.
(4) Assure that specific biblical principles and standards of conduct and belief are identified and implemented by the offender.
(5) Provide a schedule for review of the offender’s progress.

3. Reinstatement. After finishing the plan for restoration, the individual will prepare a written request for reinstatement and provide evidence of successful completion of the plan for restoration to the governance authority. An individual under restoration is not guaranteed full reinstatement to all rights and privileges previously held. Factors prohibiting the offender from obtaining reinstatement include but are not limited to:
a. Failure to guarantee that the offence will not be repeated.
 b. Involvement in multiple offenses, repeated sexual misconduct, or any child/vulnerable adult abuse.
c. Rejection of any aspect of the disciplinary or restoration process.
d. Refusal of the secular or religious community to accept the offender after reinstatement. The decision on reinstatement will be subject to the appeal to the appropriate official as outlined below.

 IX. APPEAL

1. Grounds for Appeal. One and only one appeal may be made from any verdict of the Committee on Discipline to the next higher level of jurisdiction, and the resulting decision on the matter will be considered final. Grounds for appeal are:
a. Material error in the Committee’s factual determination based on the evidence presented.
b. Material error in the Committee’s application of standards of conduct and belief as expressed in the Scripture or C&MA doctrine.

2. Procedure for Appeal. Only the defendant has the right to appeal a decision of the Committee on Discipline.
a. The appeal will be made in writing to the next level of jurisdiction no later than thirty days after the verdict of the Committee has been communicated. A copy of the appeal will be submitted to the governance authority who convened the original disciplinary hearing.
b. The original governance authority will forward a copy of all proceedings to the governance authority to whom appeal has been made, along with copies of all correspondence with the individual making the appeal.
c. The governance authority to whom the appeal has been made may appoint a committee to assist in the appeal process and in reviewing all previous proceedings.
d. The governance authority and committee, if any, may:
(1) Affirm the decision of the Committee on Discipline.
(2) Reverse the decision in part or in whole.
(3) Return the case to the Committee on Discipline for further consideration.
(4) Reduce the penalty.

e. Disputes regarding or arising out of the appeal process, including whether the decision was supported by the evidence, will be decided by this appeal process as a matter of ecclesiastical law, and not in or through a court of law or according to civil law.

3. Levels of Jurisdiction. Levels of jurisdiction used in the appeal process: a. If the defendant is a church member, the appeal is made to the district superintendent. b. If the defendant is a district worker, the appeal is made to the vice president for National Church Ministries. c. If the defendant is a C&MA National Office employee or officer, the appeal is made to the chairman of the Board of Directors.

X. REQUEST FOR REVIEW The individual who submitted the original charge may request a review of the decision to dismiss the charge as outlined in Section IV, item 1 or 3 above. The request for review will be submitted in writing to the appropriate level of jurisdiction as identified in Section IX, item 2. The request will be submitted within fourteen calendar days following the decision to dismiss. The scope of the review is determined by the governance authority conducting the review. The review decision is final.

XI. AMENDMENTS Amendments to this document may be made by the Board of Directors of The Christian and Missionary Alliance. -END-

You are X, and X is you
But you don't even have a clue
He's like a mirror in front of you
Spouse abuse, that's what you do.

But it's not only spouse abuse
We've tried to tell you--but what's the use?
Your self-deceit is so profuse
And now you stand without excuse

If you could only see the scars
And how God's holy name you mar
Because you've wandered oh, so far
Into rage--that's who you are.

They all continue in our prayers for God's peace and justice...Matthew 18... steward@peacemakers.net